Cheech and Chong - Comedy Skits

Were you a fan of their comedy?
I was.
Make that - I Still am.

Well anyway, they had this skit about sister mary elephant. and she's asking the class to quiet down, they ignore her, she asks again, they continue to ignore her. then at some point she gets frustrated and screams at the top of her lungs... then the class gets quiet and she says "thank-you"
Well, I like that skit. Here are the "lyrics" I found on leo's lyrics

TEACHER: Good morning, class. Good morning, class. Class? Class!?
SHUT UP!!!!! Thank you.
As you know your regular teacher Sister Rosetta Stone is on a small
vacation. However she does send her love, at least fingerpaintings, and desk club she`s making. I am your substitute teacher, Sister Mary Elephant.
Class, attention. Attention, class! Class?
SHUT UP!!!!! Thank you.
Young man, now give me that knife. Thank you.
Now class, you all know who I am, so let`s find out who you are.
Class? Class!? SHUT UP!!!!!

CHONG: Far out, man!

TEACHER: Thank you.
Now class, Sister Rosetta has informed me that your assignment for the last two months has been to write an essay in titled How I Spent My Summer Vacation. Who would like to read theirs before the class?
Class? Class!? Cla-- SHUT UP!!!!! Thank you.

Young man in the first row, stand up, state your name, and read your essay.
STUDENT: Who me?
TEACHER: Yes. Read your essay, please!
STUDENT: Uh, I don`t have it finished yet.
TEACHER: Well then, read what you have, young man!
STUDENT: Okay. The first day on my vacation, what I did on my summer vacation, the first day on my vacation, I woke up. Then, I went downtown to a quiet job. Then I hung out in front of the drugstore. The second day on my summer vacation, I woke up, then I went downtown to look for a job. Then I hung out in front of the drugstore. The third day on my summer vacation, I woke up...
TEACHER: Now that`s fine, young man!
STUDENT : ...Then I went downtown to look for a job...
TEACHER: Now that`s fine, young man!
STUDENT : ...Then I got a job, keeping people from here and out in front of the drugstore. The fourth day on my...
TEACHER: Young man? Young man? Young man!?
SHUT UP!!!!!
Thank you.
Now class, I have a surprise for you! I`m going to read you some poems out of this lovely book of poetry. The sun kisses the morning skies. The birds kiss the butterflies. The dew kisses the morning grass.
Class? Class!? Cla-- WAKE UP!!!!!

CHONG: I gotta go to the can, man!

Transcribed by Michael Hack

oh and another one is where the guy is in a drive- thru and wants a larg orange drink... the drive-thru guy doesn't understand and the guy is like "drink! drink! drink!"
yeah, its funny. ok so maybe its just funny to me.
I have the cd somewhere. I'll have to go find it and listen to it again.

Oh, and I always get a kick out of this one, Mexican Americans. I highlighted my favorite part cos its all me.

[Cheech]
Mexican Americans dont like to just get into gang fights they like
flowers and music and white girls named Deby too.

Mexican Americans are named Chata and Chella and Chema and have a son-in-law named Jeff.

Mexican Americans dont like to get up early in the morning but they have to so they do it real slow.

Mexican Americans love education so they go to night school and take they spanish and get a B.

(Ya leave that in)

Mexican Americans love their nana's and their nono's and their nina's and their nino's nanonanoninaninonooooo

Mexican Americans dont like to go to the movies where the dude has to where contact lenseses to make his blue eyes brown cuz dont it make my brow eyes blue.

[Cheech] And thats all I got how do you like it
[Chong] oh ya thats good
[Cheech] Its like a protest tune
[Chong] ya I dig that but while you were singing that I wrote another tune
[Cheech] oh ya
[Chong] its like the same thing only different wanna hear it
[Cheech] ya lets hear it
[Chong] its more rock n roll
[Cheech] alright we'll get down
[Chong] Beaners....Beaners i have to work more on the lyrics but its kinda like that
[Cheech] ya thats heavy

So there's another comedy skit that I just love.
Its by Eddie Murphy and I believe its called The Barbeque when his aunt falls down the stairs and yells, "oh lawd jeesus, hep meh" tumble tumble "mah shoe" tumble tumble . maybe it doesn't go exactly like that, but the "mah shoe" was always my favorite part. I'll save that for another day.